Let’s say, hypothetically, that you’re a mid-30s Internet millionaire with a beautiful family including a kid in elementary school. You’re looking for a way to spend far more money than is strictly required on some minor luxury, but you also want to begin molding your child into a miniature version of your slightly nerdy self. How, you ask, could you most efficiently combine your needs for conspicuous consumption, vicarious living, and geekery?
You, my friend, need to check out the Lunchbox Collector over at http://www.lunchboxcollector.com/vintage.html and choose one of many antique lunch boxes. (Non-IE users may need to scroll the page to the right.) $975 for a mint condition Star Wars lunchbox? How can you go wrong?
Also, if the above description is mostly accurate but you’re more into cringe-inducing attempts at humor instead of a totally bad-ass X-Wing, you could also drop $550 on a fashionable vinyl Ziggy lunchbox from 1974. Thermos included, trenchant insights into the human condition not available at this time–although I guess you could cut something out of the sometimes-poorly-named funny pages and tape it to the box.
p.s. Try not to go off on your kid when they trade the lunchbox to a classmate for a Ho-Ho and a G.I. Joe temporary tattoo. Thirty years from now, when they’re spending $50,000 on a new-in-box G.I. Joe camouflage sheet and duvet set, they’ll think back on this and realize what they did.
p.p.s. Maybe you should buy the bedsheets now and sell them to your kid for $40,000 later. Might be a good investment–that’s all I’m saying.
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